


Leave You in the Dark

by LibraryMage



Series: Break Your Chains [19]
Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Autistic Character, Autistic Ezra Bridger, Canon-Typical Violence, Child Abuse, Father-Son Relationship, Force Bond (Star Wars), Found Family, Gen, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 12:18:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13458096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LibraryMage/pseuds/LibraryMage
Summary: Kanan, Ezra, and Ahsoka leave Atollon in search of knowledge about the Sith.





	1. Chapter 1

Ezra could feel the cold of Malachor before he even set foot on the planet.  It was the cold of the dark side, deep and unending and alive.  He didn’t need them to say anything to know that Ahsoka and Kanan felt it, too.  As he stepped off the _Phantom_ , Ezra felt Kanan’s hand on his shoulder, and with it his warm, steady presence in the Force, pushing back the darkness.

The planet was a barren landscape broken only by tall columns scattered as far as the eye could see.  As they approached the nearest one, Ezra could see something carved into the stone.  As he stared at the carvings, Ezra felt something in the back of his mind, like a whisper he could just barely hear.

“This writing,” Ahsoka said, leaning in close to examine the carvings, “it’s in the Old Tongue.”

“Can you read it?” Kanan asked.

“I can try,” Ahsoka said.  As she stumbled over the words, her voice faded into the back of Ezra’s mind, overtaken by that whisper, now louder, more insistent.  He reached out toward the column, just barely hearing Kanan’s voice telling him not to touch it.

As Ezra’s fingers brushed the stone, the ground shook before cracking open and collapsing beneath him.  Ezra reached out, using the Force to cushion his fall.  His knees buckled as he hit the ground.  He fell forward and scraped his palm as he threw his hand out to catch himself.  As he got himself back onto his feet, he looked around to see Ahsoka helping Kanan stand up.

They were standing in a large cavern, just barely illuminated by rays of light coming down through cracks in the surface above.  Scattered around them was debris that looked like it had been thrown by an explosion, and between the fallen chunks of stone…they looked like bodies, but they were dark gray and black, burned so badly no features were left to identify them.  And in the distance, rising above all of it, was a structure of stone and metal.

“What is this place?” Ezra asked as he stared up at it.

“A Sith temple,” Ahsoka said.  She glanced back over her shoulder at Kanan, and the two of them shared a look Ezra couldn’t read.  Ahsoka quickly nodded and took the lead, beginning to walk toward the temple.

As Ezra followed her, his comm lit up, broadcasting a series of low-toned whirrs and beeps from Chopper, warning them about the unstable ground.

“Oh, we might fall through the surface?” Ezra asked, wiping the blood from his hand onto his shirt.  “Thanks for the warning.”

Ezra rolled his eyes and ignored Chopper’s comment about how maybe he should just leave them all down there.

Kanan’s commlink went off next, with Chopper telling him he’d picked up the trail of the ship that had appeared on their sensors as they entered the atmosphere.

“Looks like we’re heading the right way,” Kanan said.

“I bet whatever we’re looking for is inside that temple,” Ezra said, looking up at the structure that loomed ahead of them.  The temple, the planet, they didn’t scare Ezra as much as he thought they should.  In fact, he wished they scared him more.  Instead, the darkness felt familiar to the point where it was almost comforting.

“No better place to learn about the Sith,” Kanan said, his voice holding a bitter almost-sarcasm.

Ezra privately thought that he’d be just fine never learning anything else about the Sith again.

As they followed Ahsoka, Kanan dropped back so he was walking beside Ezra.

“Are you okay?” he asked.  Ezra just nodded, keeping his eyes on the ground ahead of him.

“You sure?” Kanan asked, seeing right through Ezra’s response.  “I know this probably isn’t an easy place for you to be.”

“It’s too easy for me to be here,” Ezra muttered, crossing his arms.  “And the sooner we can leave, the better.”

Kanan’s hand rested on his shoulder for a second.

“Don’t worry,” he said.  “We’ll be off this rock soon enough.  Just keep your guard up.  If there’s a ship, we’re not alone down here.”

Ezra nodded.  As they continued walking toward the temple in silence, he heard a sound in the distance, somewhere off to his right.  He stopped and looked, squinting as he stared into the shadows, but he saw nothing there.  He shook his head and kept walking, picking up his pace so he could catch up to the others.

As the three of them wove their way through the debris, Ezra’s eyes were drawn to the bodies scattered around them.  He could feel distant echoes of rage and pain and the brief moment of terror just before death.  It filled the air around him like smoke, cutting off his breath.

_Ezra._

The echoes bounced off each other, growing bigger and louder and stronger, crashing together in his mind until he felt like his head would split open.

“Ezra?”

The sound of Kanan’s voice and the sudden pressure of a hand on his shoulder snapped Ezra back to where he was.  He didn’t realize he’d stopped moving again.  He looked down at the ground just in front of where he stood.  He reached down and picked up the lightsaber that lay at his feet, the movement almost automatic.

“What happened here?” he asked as he slowly turned the weapon over in his hand.  It felt heavier than it looked, as if those echoes that surrounded them were clinging to it, weighing it down.

“Thousands of years ago,” Ahsoka told him, “Jedi knights attacked this temple.”

Ezra cast a glance around at the debris and bodies that surrounded them.  It was impossible to tell which were from what side of the battle.

“Who won?” he asked.

“From what I can tell, nobody did,” Ahsoka said, her gaze following Ezra’s.

“Hate to interrupt this history lesson,” Kanan said, “but we should keep moving.”

Ezra nodded and set the lightsaber back on the ground beside the body of its wielder.

“If you ask me, this whole planet is a riddle,” he said as he began to walk beside Kanan again.

“If it’s a riddle, then what’s the question?”

Ezra gave a small smile and rolled his yes.

“Why is Kanan such --” he saw a flash of movement in the shadows behind Kanan and ignited his lightsaber.

“Look out!” he said, jumping past Kanan and catching the red blade of another saber on his own.

Their attacker was an Inquisitor.  Not one of the ones they’d met before, but his round-hilted lightsaber was unmistakable.

The Inquisitor drew back before attacking again, his blade slashing at Ezra’s side.  As Ahsoka lunged forward, the Inquisitor leapt back, pulling out two small explosives and hurling them at the three Jedi.

The charges went off as they hit the ground and Ezra was knocked aside by the blast.  He landed on his side only for the unstable ground to give way beneath him, sending him plummeting into darkness again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for: child abuse; manipulation; gaslighting

Ezra’s back hit something solid, knocking the air from his lungs.  Instinctively, he raised his hands to shield himself, reaching out through the Force and pushing large chunks of stone out of the way before they could hit him.

“Ezra!” Kanan called.  Ezra could see him standing about twenty feet above him, at the edge of a hole that had been blown in the ground.

“I’m okay!” Ezra called back as he sat up.  “Go!  I’ll catch up!”

Kanan hesitated for a moment before nodding and turning away, following Ahsoka after the Inquisitor.

Ezra gazed up at the hole he’d fallen through, trying to gauge whether he could jump the distance.  As he prepared to try, he felt it.  A familiar presence, almost masked by the overwhelming darkness of Malachor.  Ezra froze, silently hoping that he was wrong.  How could he be here?  _Why_ would he be here?  This had to be a trick, like in the Jedi Temple back on Lothal.

“I knew I would find you here,” that familiar voice said.

Ezra turned around, his heart hammering in his chest, to see Maul emerge from the shadows, his eyes almost glowing in the darkness.  Ezra’s hand jumped to his lightsaber.

“Stay back,” he said as the red blade appeared in his hand.  Kanan’s warning to him echoed in his head.  _You run and find me._

He was about to shout for Kanan and Ahsoka, but before he could, the air closed around his throat.  He was dragged forward and dropped to the ground, landing on his hands and knees in front of his former master.  He reached for his lightsaber, which had fallen just inches away from him, only for it to fly out of his reach and into Maul’s outstretched hand.

Ezra stumbled to his feet and turned away, intending to run, but Maul grabbed his arm, holding him back.

“Let me go!” Ezra shouted, trying to break out of Maul’s grip, hoping that Kanan and Ahsoka were still close enough to hear him.  “Kanan!”

Ezra had just barely managed to get his master’s name out when he was dragged backward.  Maul threw one arm around Ezra, pinning his arms to his sides and holding Ezra back against his chest.  Just as Ezra was about to call for Kanan again, Maul’s free hand came down over his mouth.  Ezra bit down as hard as he could, tasting blood, but it had no effect.  Ezra dug his heels against the ground as Maul began to drag him into the shadows, but he wasn’t strong enough to resist.

“Calm down, apprentice,” Maul hissed as he came to a stop, far enough into the cavern that Ezra knew Kanan and Ahsoka couldn’t hear him even if he’d been able to scream.  He was on his own.

As much as he hated the idea of ever following an order from Maul again, Ezra forced himself to stop struggling.  It was the only way Maul would let go.  Maul held onto him for a moment longer, making sure he had really stopped fighting.  It was only a few seconds, but to Ezra, it felt like an eternity before Maul released him, keeping a tight, painful grip on Ezra’s wrist.

“Let me go,” Ezra said again.

“I can't do that,” Maul said.  “Not yet.”

Ezra looked back over his shoulder.  He could still just see the fragments of light coming through the hole he’d fallen through.  Maybe if --

Maul grabbed Ezra’s chin, forcing him to look at his former master.

“Call for him again and you will regret it,” Maul said.  Ezra quickly averted his gaze as Maul released him.

“How did you find me?” Ezra asked, still trying to tug his wrist away from Maul’s hand.

“You didn’t think I would let you break our bond so easily, did you?” Maul asked him.

Ezra’s attempts to break free stopped as he stared up at Maul in disbelief.  Maul smiled, as if he was enjoying Ezra’s confusion and distress.

“You damaged it,” Maul said, “but a bond between master and apprentice is hard to destroy, and our bond runs deeper than most.”

“No,” Ezra said.  “That’s not -- I --”  The words died in his throat.

Maul placed his free hand on Ezra’s shoulder as if to comfort him.  Ezra flinched and pulled away from the touch.

“I know why you came here, Ezra,” he said.  “You seek knowledge about the Sith.  Knowledge we can find, but only if we work together.”

“Why would I ever work with you again?” Ezra asked.

“Because if you do, I will allow you to leave,” Maul said.  “I won't stop you.”

“I don’t believe you,” Ezra said.  He knew Maul would never willingly let him go, and he couldn’t believe Maul thought he could be so easily tricked.

“That doesn’t matter,” Maul said.  “You _will_ help me, one way or the other.  Either you do it willingly and you can leave here with the Jedi, or you refuse, and you will never see him again.”

Ezra said nothing, only glared down at the ground, wanting to look anywhere but at Maul.  He knew the best way out of this was to make Maul think he was cooperating.  And some small part of him wanted to believe Maul would let him go if he just did what he asked.  Maybe it would be easier to just…

Maul seemed to sense the conflict in Ezra’s mind and released his grip on the boy’s wrist.

“This is a Sith temple, Ezra,” he said.  “It takes a master and an apprentice to gain entry, and you know the Jedi won't be able to open its doors.”

Ezra knew Maul was right and he hated it.  Kanan and Ahsoka wouldn’t be able to enter a Sith temple, not without embracing the dark side.  And that was something Ezra would die before he’d see either of them do.  If they even _could_ do it.

“Fine,” Ezra said, forcing the word out through gritted teeth.  “If that’s what it takes to get away from _you_ , I’ll do it.”

“I am not your enemy, Ezra,” Maul said.  Ezra cringed at the tone in his voice, like he was scolding a child.  “The Empire is.  You said it yourself the night you ran away.  We have the same goal.”

“I was wrong,” Ezra snapped, the words bursting forth like a dam had broken in his mind.  “Kanan and the others want justice for everything the Empire has done to everyone.  You just want your revenge.  As long as Sidious dies, the rest of the galaxy can burn, right?  What does it matter who else gets hurt?”

“That never seemed to bother you before,” Maul said.

“Let’s just get this over with,” Ezra growled, refusing to acknowledge what Maul had said.  He was _right_ , Ezra _had_ learned to put aside any concern about collateral damage.  To destroy the people who’d destroyed his family and to kill the man who’d betrayed his master, any amount of damage was acceptable.

Maul held out Ezra’s lightsaber toward him.  Ezra stared at the weapon, wondering why Maul would give it back to him.  He felt Maul’s surge of frustrated impatience as he took hold of Ezra’s wrist again and placed the lightsaber in his hand.

“Follow me,” Maul said, turning away from Ezra.

Ezra took a deep, shaking breath before he fell into step behind his former master.  As he walked behind Maul, Ezra felt the cold fire of anger rising up in his chest, making him want to scream.  He hated himself for wordlessly obeying Maul’s order, and he hated Maul for putting him in this position.  As he looked at Maul, walking ahead of him, his right hand closed around his lightsaber.

“Don’t try it,” Maul said, not even needing to turn around to know what Ezra had been thinking of doing.  Ezra released his grip on his lightsaber.

“Why would you let me go?” Ezra asked.  It didn’t make any sense.  Maul could easily just take him off the planet now and Kanan and Ahsoka wouldn’t even know something had happened to him until it was too late.

“Because this won't last,” Maul said, slowing down his pace so Ezra could draw even with him.  “You are not a Jedi, Ezra, and you were never meant to be one.  Soon enough, either you will realize that, or the man who thinks he’s your master will, and when that happens, you will come back to me.”

Ezra folded his arms around his chest, staring down at the ground.  As hard as he tried to convince himself that Maul was wrong, his words stuck in his mind and stung like needles stabbing at his heart.  He had tried to avoid thinking about that fear since he’d been forced to face it in the Jedi temple on Lothal, but it still remained, lurking just under the surface.  What if he was too far gone to ever become a Jedi?  And what would happen to him when Kanan finally opened his eyes and saw it?

Ezra flinched as Maul’s hand rested on his shoulder.

“This was a mistake, Ezra,” he said, his voice unusually gentle, “but it’s one you can fix.  Just come back.  Come _home._ ”

Ezra pulled himself away from his former master’s touch, hating how much he wanted to listen to his words.  The idea of returning to Maul’s side, of going back to the place he’d once called home was so tempting, and he didn't understand why.  He thought he had moved past wanting to go back, but all it took to make him want it again was Maul holding it in front of him, offering him a chance to come home and be forgiven.

“My home is with Kanan,” he said, forcing himself not to follow those thoughts, “not with you.”

“You don’t belong with him,” Maul said.  “He doesn’t trust you.  Why would he?  You were raised in the dark side.  In his eyes, you’re a Sith, and you will never be anything else.”

“He’s not like that,” Ezra growled, his hands curling into fists at his sides.

“He is a Jedi,” Maul said.  “They are _all_ like that.  Or they were.”

“That’s not true!” Ezra snapped.  Maul had taught him little about the Jedi, but he knew now that everything he’d said was a lie.

“Would you be this angry if you weren’t afraid I was right?” Maul asked, relentless in his attack on that shred of doubt and insecurity he’d found.  “I can feel your fear, Ezra, and I know you can sense his suspicion.  You know he’s always watching for signs of you returning to your true path.  You know he expects you to fail.”

“Shut up!” Ezra shouted, his fury bursting out of him, refusing to be contained any longer.

Ezra immediately froze in his tracks, his anger evaporating in an instant, fear rising to take its place.  He had never in his life spoken to his master -- _no, Maul, not his master_ \-- like that.  Time seemed to stop as Ezra waited for Maul’s reaction.

“You know it’s true,” Maul said, his voice cutting through Ezra’s terrified silence like a knife.

“It’s not,” Ezra said as Maul turned away from him and continued to lead the way through the cavern.  “He trusts me.  We’re family.”

He didn’t know why he even bothered to say it.  Maul wasn’t the one he was trying to convince.

“He is a Jedi,” Maul said.  “He doesn’t think of you as family.”

 _And you do?_ Ezra thought, but didn’t say.  He knew if he said it, Maul would only seize his chance to try and convince Ezra they _were_ like family, that he cared about Ezra in a way Kanan didn’t, or couldn’t.

“He’s only interested in making you turn your back on your own strength,” Maul said.  “Removing one more dark side wielder from the galaxy is what matters to him.”

Ezra’s nails were digging into his palms as he bunched his hands into fists to stop them from shaking.  Of all people, Maul was in no position to accuse Kanan of using him.

“He is _weak_ ,” Maul said, “and he will die like the rest of the Jedi, and if you continue to follow him, so will you.”

“Since when do you care?” Ezra shot back.

“And what do you mean by that?” Maul asked him, in a voice that made Ezra sure he knew exactly what he meant.

“I was expendable, wasn’t I?” Ezra asked.  “If I’d been killed, would you have even cared?”

Maul rounded on Ezra, who flinched back as Maul grabbed his wrist, forcing him to stop in his tracks.

“You are my apprentice, Ezra,” he said, his hand clutching tightly around Ezra’s wrist hard enough that pain shot up his arm.  “You were _never_ expendable, not like I was.  I promised you I would never abandon you like my master did to me, and I meant it.”

“I can't even tell if you’re lying to me,” Ezra said, wrenching his arm out of Maul’s grip.

“I have never lied to you,” Maul said.

“Let’s just get this over with,” Ezra growled.

As they continued their trek through the dark, twisting caverns, Ezra mentally braced himself, waiting for whatever Maul would say next to try and get inside his head, twist everything around, and convince him that he was better off as Maul’s apprentice.  But Maul remained silent.  Ezra wondered if that was just another part of the mind games he was playing, saying nothing and letting everything he’d already said fester in Ezra’s head.

Ezra almost wanted to break the increasingly uncomfortable silence himself, but before he could say anything, Maul spoke again.

“This is it,” he said.  Sure enough, as Ezra followed his gaze, he saw a large slab of stone, etched with carvings similar to those on the columns that broke through the planet’s surface.

Ezra stayed quiet as he followed Maul, mentally preparing himself for whatever he was about to walk into.  As they drew closer to the door, the air felt colder and colder until Ezra was shivering.  As they stopped in front of the door, Maul cast a disappointed look at Ezra as he saw how this place was affecting him.  Ezra tried to steady himself, even as he wondered why he cared what Maul thought.

“What do I have to do?” Ezra asked, his voice bitter, not even trying to hide how much he resented everything about this situation.

“You just need to lift the stone,” Maul told him.

Hating himself with every second, Ezra reached out, feeling the Force flowing around him and through him.  The temple seemed to draw his focus and his power toward it, like it _wanted_ him to open the door.  But the stone wouldn’t budge.

“You know what you need to do,” Maul said, his voice threading its way through Ezra’s mind.  “Your strength comes from your anger.  If you don’t draw on it, you will never get this door open.”

“No,” Ezra said.  “I’m not giving into it.  Not again.”  _Not for you._

“We don’t have time for this, Ezra,” Maul snapped, roughly grabbing Ezra’s arm.  “The Inquisitor could easily have killed the Jedi already and he will be looking for you next.”

“Let go of me,” Ezra growled.  Maul only gripped his arm tighter, drawing a small gasp of pain from Ezra.

“Open the door, Ezra,” Maul said.  “Do it or you will _never_ see the Jedi again.”

Ezra’s blood felt like it was turning to ice in his veins, bitter cold radiating through him from the point where Maul touched him.

“You hate me right now, don’t you?” Maul said.  “Use it.”

“I always hated you,” Ezra said, his voice bitter.

“No, you didn’t,” Maul said, not fooled for a moment by Ezra’s lie.  “You feared me, but you looked up to me.  You were always so desperate to prove yourself to me, to make me _proud_.”

Ezra fought to reign in the fury surging up in his chest.  He knew what Maul was doing, reminding him of his past to make him angry.  It wouldn’t work.  He wouldn’t let it.

“And you did,” Maul continued.  “You were everything I could have hoped for.”

“Stop!” Ezra said.

“Use your anger, Ezra,” Maul said.  “Prove me right.  Show me I made the right choice taking you in.”

 _Emotion, yet peace,_ Ezra thought to himself.  _You’re a Jedi.  You’re stronger than the darkness.  You can open this damn door without giving into it._

For just a moment, the stone looked like it was about to move, shaking just slightly before it fell inert again.

“Pathetic,” Maul said.  The word felt like a knife piercing Ezra’s heart, even as he tried to tell himself that he didn’t care, that it didn’t matter what Maul thought.

“I’m trying,” Ezra said, the words coming out before he could stop them.

“The only thing you are trying to do is run away from your destiny,” Maul said, his voice harsh.  “You are not a Jedi.  You are _my_ apprentice.  And unless you accept that, you will only continue to fail.”

Ezra shook his head, trying to block out Maul’s words, but his voice was like a battering ram against Ezra’s mind.

“You have always belonged to the dark side,” he said, “and to me.  Denying it has only made you weaker.”

“No,” Ezra said quietly.

“Stop fighting it, Ezra,” Maul said.  “Accept your destiny, accept your power.”

“No!”

“Embrace who you truly are, son.”

Fury rose in Ezra’s chest at the sound of the word.  He clung to it, letting it burn like fuel in his heart as he reached out, his consciousness flowing around the stone in front of him and pushing it up, lifting it off the ground.  It was sheer instinct, brought forth by anger so strong that for a moment he lost the ability to care what he did with it.  A spark of horror flashed through Ezra’s mind as he realized he’d just done what he’d sworn not to do.  But he’d opened the door and it was too late to stop now.  He held that anger in his heart, drawing on it for strength, finding comfort in the familiar, exhilarating rush of power.

Maul led him forward and Ezra allowed him to.  As they passed beneath the stone, Ezra saw their path was blocked by another.  Maul reached out, lifting the stone ahead of them just as Ezra had, only to reveal a third beyond it.

“Release the one behind you,” Maul said.

As Ezra did so, the first stone fell with a _crash_ that shook the ground they stood on, trapping them inside.  Ezra held on to his anger with more ferocity than before.  He _couldn’t_ let go of it now.  If he did, they would stay trapped, and Maul wouldn’t be able to hold the stone above them forever.

Lifting the third stone door was easier than the first, but just barely.  Ezra’s heart sank as he saw a fourth stone behind it.  How many were there?  Would they even be able to make it into the temple?  His fear and despair heightened as Maul lifted the fourth stone to reveal yet another.  He shoved those feelings aside.  He couldn’t let them overtake his anger.  He had to keep going.  He _had_ to.

Relief washed over him as he lifted the final door to find that it led onto a ledge overlooking a steep drop.  He rushed forward and let the stone drop behind him as he fell to his knees, breathing heavily.  He felt a hand on his shoulder and immediately pulled away, his fury spiking in his chest as Maul’s words to him echoed in his head.

“Don’t _ever_ call me that,” Ezra growled.  “I’m not your -- I’m not --”

“Get up,” Maul told him.  Ezra quickly obeyed without even thinking about it.

The ledge they stood on looked out over a dark abyss so deep Ezra couldn’t see where it ended.  In the center of the chasm, directly across from where they stood, was a platform, and on it…

“Is that a holocron?” he asked.  At Maul’s questioning look, Ezra realized Maul hadn’t been the one who taught him about holocrons.

“My master told me about them,” he said, emphasizing the word _master_ just because he knew it would make Maul furious to hear him calling Kanan that.  “He has one, but it’s different.”

“That’s because this is a Sith holocron,” Maul said, apparently ignoring Ezra’s attempt to antagonize him.  “And it holds the knowledge we both came here to find.”

“How do we get to it?” Ezra asked.  Maul said nothing and only looked at him expectantly, like he was waiting for Ezra to give the answer himself.  The thought that Maul was testing him only made Ezra angrier.  Ezra was not his apprentice anymore.  What right did Maul have to put him through this?

But Ezra _did_ know how to get across.  And it meant putting his life in Maul’s hands.  Again.

“I’ll jump,” he said, “and you use the Force to throw me.”

He took a few steps back from the ledge, taking a deep breath as he prepared to jump.  He hesitated for a moment as he wondered if he could really trust Maul to do this.

 _You don’t have to trust him,_ he reminded himself.  _He needs you right now.  He can’t do this alone._

Ezra forced himself to take some small measure of comfort in that, and in the fact that with all the trouble Maul had gone to in trying to get him to return to the dark side, he could be reasonably sure Maul wasn’t planning to kill him.

Holding those barely-comforting thoughts in his mind, Ezra ran and leapt from the ledge.  He made it about halfway across the chasm under his own power before he felt something push at him, propelling him farther.  As Ezra hit the platform, he stumbled, nearly skidding all the way across it to the opposite side.  He braced his hands against the stone to stop himself before he went over the edge.

As he stood up and reached out toward the holocron, he hesitated again, but he quickly brushed aside all questions of whether or not this was worth it.  It was too late to turn back now.  He and Kanan and Ahsoka had come here for knowledge, and if there was one thing you could find in a holocron, it was knowledge.  Once he had the holocron in his hands, he would run and he would find his way back to Kanan.  Whatever secrets he would find here, Maul wouldn’t get his hands on them.

As Ezra’s hand closed around the holocron, the platform beneath him began to shake.  Slowly, it began to rise up toward the ceiling, where a bright, burning light had sprung to life, crackling like electricity.  Ezra had no idea what it would do to him, and he was not at all eager to find out.

“Jump!” Maul called to him.  Ezra looked down to see nothing beneath him but darkness.

“I won't make it!” he called back.

“Trust me!”

Ezra looked back up to see that burning light growing closer and closer.  With no time left to think through his actions, he leapt from the platform.

He plummeted through the air, holding tightly to the holocron as he fell.  Terror shot through him as he dropped straight past the ledge that Maul stood on and kept falling until he…stopped.  He hung there, suspended in the air and slowly, he was dragged back upwards.  As he drew closer to the ledge, he reached for it, only for Maul to catch his hand and pull him back onto solid ground.

“There was never anything to fear,” Maul said, gently cupping Ezra’s chin in an affectionate gesture that made Ezra’s skin crawl.  “You were wise to trust me.”

Ezra took a step back, pulling himself out of Maul’s reach.

“I don’t trust you,” he said.

As Ezra began to turn away from him, searching for another way out, Maul took a step toward him and gripped Ezra’s chin hard, forcing the boy to look into his eyes.  Ezra shut his own eyes in an attempt to avoid it.

“Look at me, Ezra” Maul said.  When Ezra didn’t obey, Maul’s grip only grew tighter.  With a small gasp of pain, Ezra opened his eyes.

Maul’s eyes narrowed as he stared as Ezra, as if he was looking for something.  A small smile crossed his face, making dread flutter in Ezra’s chest.

“What are you doing?” Ezra asked as Maul released him and turned away.

Maul only held out his hand, clearly not about to tell Ezra anything.

“Give me the holocron,” he said.

“That’s not going to happen,” Ezra said.

Maul let out an impatient sigh and turned back to Ezra.  Ezra flinched as Maul reached out toward him and pulled the holocron from his hands.  Maul placed the holocron inside an indent in the wall and Ezra heard the stone doors that had sealed them inside the temple begin to shift.  As they rose up, one after the other, Maul handed the holocron back to Ezra.

“Sith holocrons are keys that can open many doors,” he said.

Ezra stared at the object in his hands for a second.  Was Maul really that convinced that Ezra was going to cooperate and wouldn’t run as soon as they were out of the temple?  Or did he just think he’d be able to stop him if he tried?

As the final door rose up, a familiar sound echoed toward Ezra.  The _hum_ of a lightsaber, the _clash_ of two weapons striking against each other.  Kanan and Ahsoka stood outside the temple, locked in combat with three Inquisitors.  Ezra ran forward, drawing his own lightsaber as he rushed to help his master and his friend.

Kanan raised his blade to block a vicious downward strike from the Mirialan Inquisitor.  He must have heard footsteps behind him and looked over his shoulder, a look of relief spreading across his face briefly as he saw Ezra.  His gaze slid past his apprentice and his eyes locked onto Maul.

“Ahsoka!” Kanan said.

Ahsoka was deflecting a blow from the Fifth Brother with one of her lightsabers as she slashed at the other Inquisitor’s gut with the other, just barely missing him as he dodged out of the way.  At Kanan’s call, she followed his gaze.

“Oh, great,” she muttered.  She disengaged and pushed through the Force, sending the Eighth Brother flying into his comrade.

As the Eighth Brother got back onto his feet, he leapt at Ahsoka.  She raised her lightsabers, crossing them over her head and catching his weapon between them.  In the corner of her eye, she saw the flash of a red blade as Maul rushed forward, blocking a strike from the Fifth Brother, who had moved to attack Ahsoka while she was distracted.  Ahsoka would have stared in shocked disbelief if she had the time.  Instead, she twisted her arms, her muscles screaming as she hurled her opponent to the side.  She followed through with a slash to his leg and turned her attention to Kanan and Ezra, who were fending off the Seventh Sister.

Kanan parried a slash at his chest.  The Inquisitor swung her blade around and down in a strong overhead attack.  Kanan caught her blade on his, pushing back as she bore down on him.  Ezra lunged at her, his blade aiming at her side.  She broke off her attack on Kanan and deflected Ezra’s strike.  Kanan rushed at her, backing her into a corner.  She quickly glanced between the two of them, sizing up the situation.  She kicked Ezra in the stomach, and as he doubled over, she shoved him aside, slashing her lightsaber toward him wildly.  Ezra dodged just in time to avoid a blow to his arm.

“Fall back!” she shouted.  The other two Inquisitors broke off their attacks and followed her, disappearing into the shadows to regroup.

Ezra switched his lightsaber off, even as his grip tightened around the weapon, his anger overpowering him.  He knew it was reckless and dangerous, but he desperately wanted to follow them, to cut each of them down, to _hurt_ them.  He jumped as Maul’s hands came down on his shoulders as if to hold him back.

“Don’t,” Maul warned him.  Ezra’s fury subsided as he watched the Inquisitors fade into the darkness.

Kanan’s eyes landed on Ezra, and Ezra could feel something in his master’s mind recoil like he’d just touched something that burned him.

“Ezra, get away from him,” Kanan said, his eyes now fixed on Maul.  Ezra couldn’t say why, but he had a sinking feeling that Kanan was deliberately avoiding looking at him.

Maul’s hands tightened around Ezra’s shoulders.  Ezra fought down a surge of panic as he wrenched himself away from Maul and ran to Kanan’s side, desperate to get away from his former master.  Ezra could feel Kanan’s fury at the sight of Maul, his shock and fear at something he was keeping hidden, and Maul’s anger as Kanan stepped in front of Ezra.

“What are you doing here?” Kanan asked, his voice as cold as ice.

“I came to help _my_ apprentice,” Maul said.  His own voice held just as much malice as he stepped toward Kanan.

Ezra quickly stepped forward, putting himself between Kanan and Maul.

“Leave him alone,” he said.  He wouldn’t let Maul hurt Kanan.  Maul had promised to let Ezra leave with Kanan, hadn’t he?  The moment the thought crossed his mind, Ezra shoved it aside.  He knew he couldn’t trust Maul to keep his word.

“I have no plans to harm him,” Maul said, and Ezra could hear the unspoken _yet._

“Why would you help us?” Ahsoka asked, glaring suspiciously at Maul, as if she was trying to see into his mind.

“We share a common enemy,” Maul said, turning to face her.  “And a common goal.  Helping you was practical.”

“I’m touched,” Ahsoka said, bitter sarcasm lacing her voice.

“We need to move quickly,” Maul said, ignoring Ahsoka’s comment.  “The one they call Vader will be here soon.”

“How would he know to come here?” Kanan asked.

“His dogs will tell him where we are,” Maul said.  “He won't be able to resist us.”

“There is no us,” Kanan said.

“Without me, Ezra would never have found the key to the knowledge you came here to find,” Maul said.

Kanan turned his gaze to Ezra, and Ezra felt that twisting feeling in Kanan’s mind again as their eyes met briefly.  Ezra quickly looked away and held out the holocron toward Kanan.

“There’s no way a Jedi can open that holocron,” Ahsoka said.

“Ezra can,” Maul pointed out.  Ezra flinched at the sound of Maul’s voice from behind him.

“We are _not_ asking him to do that,” Kanan said.  Ezra felt a wave of relief at Kanan’s words.  “And we aren’t handing it over to you.”

“If you insist on being so stubborn, there is another way,” Maul said.  “The holocron can be used to unlock the temple itself.”

“What do you mean?” Ezra asked, turning to face him.

“At the top of the temple, there is a chamber,” Maul explained.  Ezra tried not to cringe at the tone in his voice, the same one he’d so often used when Ezra was a child and Maul was explaining the things he was trying to teach him.  “If you place the holocron in the obelisk inside, you can unlock the ancient knowledge of the Sith, and you might just find a way to defeat them once and for all.”

“You think we’d believe anything you say?” Kanan asked.

“Am I lying to you, apprentice?” Maul asked, his eyes fixed on Ezra.

“He is not your apprentice,” Kanan said, one protective hand coming down on Ezra’s shoulder.  “And if you try to stop us from leaving --”

“If you leave now, you will never find the knowledge you seek,” Maul said.  “Not if you won't allow the boy to open the holocron.”

“Why are you trying so hard to keep us here?” Ahsoka asked.

“I cannot defeat Vader alone,” Maul said, and Ezra knew instinctively that that wasn’t the whole truth.  Maul was planning something, but he was keeping it carefully closed off from Ezra.

“We should do it,” Ezra said quietly.  The words came out almost involuntarily.  He was uncertain even as he said it, but Maul was right.  Kanan and Ahsoka couldn’t open the holocron, and if Kanan wouldn’t let him do it -- not that he wanted to -- then there was no other way.

“No,” Kanan said.  Ezra flinched at the unexpected harshness in his voice and the way Kanan’s hand closed tighter around his shoulder.  “We can’t trust him, Ezra.”

“I know,” Ezra said.  “But if none of us can open it, what other choice do we have?”

Ezra could feel Kanan’s frustration like it was his own as Kanan thought through their -- extremely limited -- options.  Ezra knew Kanan had made his decision when he pulled his hand from Ezra’s shoulder and switched on his commlink.

“Chopper,” he said, “looks like we’re staying here a while longer.”

Kanan gave a frustrated sigh at Chopper’s protest.

“Yeah, I know it’s a bad idea,” he said.  He fixed Maul with a furious glare as he spoke again.  “If one of us doesn’t check in with you in an hour, contact Hera.  Tell her something’s happened and Ezra might be in trouble.”

Maul only smiled, as if he found Kanan’s protectiveness amusing.  His expression chilled Ezra to his core.

“Follow me,” Maul said as he brushed past the three Jedi.

Kanan and Ahsoka exchanged a worried look before they followed him.  Ezra fell into step behind Kanan, telling himself he was _not_ hiding behind his master, then bitterly realizing that the fact that he needed to tell himself that meant that he probably was.

Maul led them away from the door he and Ezra had entered the temple through, to a corner of the pyramid.  He pressed his hand to the stone, and with a sharp, grinding sound, part of the corner seemed to detach, creating a small platform that descended toward them.

“Ezra,” Maul said.  Ezra stepped forward and onto the platform before he even realized he’d so readily responded to Maul’s command.

As Kanan moved to follow Ezra, Maul held out a hand to stop him.

“Only two,” Maul said.  “That is the way of the Sith.”

“Well, these two come as a set,” Kanan said.  He quickly stepped around Maul and joined Ezra on the platform.

“You’ll be okay with him?” he asked Ahsoka.

“I’ll be fine,” Ahsoka said, not trying to hide the disdain in her voice as she glanced at her old enemy.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for: character death; major character injury; child abuse; attempted child abduction

As the platform they stood on began to rise, Kanan waited until they were safely out of earshot of Maul and Ahsoka before turning to Ezra.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Ezra nodded.

“Did he hurt you?”

“Not much,” Ezra said with a shrug.

“I’m sorry, Ezra,” Kanan said.  “If I’d thought --”

“There was no way you could’ve known he was here,” Ezra said.

“We should never have come to this place,” Kanan said, more to himself than to Ezra.

Ezra felt something seem to click into place in Kanan’s mind as the Jedi refocused his attention on him.

“You have your commlink on you?” Kanan asked.

Ezra nodded.

“Hide it in your boot,” Kanan said.  “He might not think to look there if…”

He let the sentence trail off, clearly not wanting to give voice to his fears.  Ezra didn’t need him to say anything.  He knew exactly what it was Kanan was preparing for.  Knowing that, Ezra couldn’t stop his hands from shaking just slightly as he silently obeyed Kanan’s order.

“Hey,” Kanan said, putting a hand on Ezra’s shoulder as the boy straightened up again.  “I won’t let him take you if I can help it.  This is just in case.”

Silence fell between them for a moment and Ezra could feel Kanan’s anger at Maul, his fear, his quiet desperation as he tried to think of a way out of this that didn’t end with someone getting hurt.

“Don’t listen to a word he says,” Kanan told him abruptly.

_He doesn’t trust you._

“I know,” Ezra said, ignoring the echo of Maul’s words in his head.

“I know you probably still have the instinct to listen to him,” Kanan said.  It had been too easy for Maul to convince Ezra that their current course of action was the right one.  “I know that can be hard to fight after so many years, but you can’t trust him.  He’s only going to hurt you again.”

“I’m not going to turn back to the dark side just because I was alone with him for a few minutes,” Ezra said, his irritation slipping into his voice even as he tried to let it go, tried to push away Maul’s warnings that Kanan didn’t trust him and was only interested in stopping him from following his supposed “true path.”

“I know,” Kanan said, though he didn’t sound entirely convinced.  As he spoke, he looked away from Ezra, averting his eyes, and Ezra could feel something… _twitch_ in Kanan’s mind.

“Kanan, what’s wrong?” Ezra asked.

“Nothing,” Kanan said quickly.

“Don’t lie to me,” Ezra said.  “Every time you look at me, it’s like you flinch.  What’s going on?”

Kanan hesitated, and for a moment, Ezra was sure he wouldn’t answer.

“It’s your eyes,” he said quietly, as if he was ashamed to be saying it.

“No,” Ezra said, knowing exactly what Kanan meant.  He felt like the air had been ripped out of his lungs.  He stared up at Kanan in disbelief or a moment before he was suddenly overcome with shame that burned at the inside of his chest and he quickly looked down so Kanan wouldn’t have to see his eyes anymore.

Maul was right.  Kanan didn’t trust him.  And worse, he was right not to.  In spite of everything Kanan was trying to teach him, Ezra _had_ given in to the dark side to get the door open, and now he bore the proof of it on his face.

“Kanan, I’m sorry,” he said.  “I didn’t --”

He stopped before he could say _I didn’t mean to._   He wasn’t even sure anymore if that was the truth.

“It’ll be okay, Ezra,” Kanan said.  But to Ezra the words sounded automatic, like Kanan didn’t believe it and was only saying it because it was the right thing to say.  “Just…one thing at a time.  Let’s get off this rock and we’ll handle this later.”

“I --”

Ezra’s attempt at another apology was cut off as he saw a flash of movement in the air behind Kanan.

“Look out!” he shouted.

Kanan barely had time to turn around before the Eighth Brother slammed into him, kicking him in the stomach and sending him flying off the platform and into the wall of the temple.  As Kanan fell to the ground, blacking out from the impact, the Inquisitor rounded on Ezra.  Ezra ignited his lightsaber and rushed forward.  The Inquisitor dodged Ezra’s attack easily, using Ezra’s own momentum to throw him to one side, over the ledge.

Ezra reached out, one hand catching the ledge and clinging to it with all of his strength.  The Inquisitor crouched in front of him, his glowing red blade held just inches from Ezra’s hand.

“Give me the holocron,” he said.  Ezra only glared up at him, refusing to let his fear show on his face, even as the Inquisitor switched the plasma blade off and several metal blades protruded from the lightsaber’s hilt, drawing closer and closer to Ezra’s hand.

“Ezra!”

The Inquisitor looked over his shoulder, briefly distracted by the sound of Maul’s voice.  He was forced to leap out of the way as Maul’s lightsaber cut through the air toward his side.  The Inquisitor looked around and, seeing he was outmatched, jumped from the ledge.

Maul’s hand closed around Ezra’s and he pulled the boy back onto the ledge.  Behind him, Ezra saw Ahsoka crouched beside Kanan, who was slowly sitting up, one hand pressed to his forehead.  Ezra could practically feel Kanan’s heart skip a beat as the Jedi’s eyes landed on him and Maul.

As Kanan stood up, Ezra pulled himself away from Maul, a pang of guilt flashing through his chest, though he wasn’t quite sure over what.

“Looks like your plan might not work after all,” Kanan said.

“Then we alter it,” Maul said, as if pointing out the obvious.  “If we split up and scale the pyramid from two sides, they will also have to divide their forces.”

“And let me guess,” Kanan said.  “Ezra goes with you?”

“It is the logical choice,” Maul said, putting a hand on Ezra’s shoulder.

“Not happening,” Kanan said, taking an aggressive step forward.

“Do you really trust him so little?” Maul asked, that amused smile returning to his face.

“You’re the one I don’t trust,” Kanan said.

“Kanan,” Ezra said quietly.  “I’ll be okay.”

“Ezra --”  Kanan put a hand on Ezra’s arm and pulled him closer, away from Maul.  When he spoke, his voice was so quiet that only Ezra could hear him.

“You don’t have to prove anything to me,” he said.

“I know,” Ezra said, his voice just as quiet, though he wasn’t quite sure if he _did_ know that.

On some level, Ezra hoped Kanan would say no, but he _wanted_ to prove he wasn’t in danger of falling again.  Whether he wanted to prove it to Kanan or Maul or himself, he didn’t know.

A look of resignation crossed Kanan’s face as he sensed Ezra’s determination.

“I don’t like this,” he said.  “Just be careful.”

"Aren't I always?" Ezra said with a small, weak attempt at a smile.

“If you two are finished,” Maul said impatiently.

Ezra stepped back, away from Kanan.  As he began to follow Maul, he could feel Kanan’s immediate regret at allowing Ezra to go with him.

“Wait,” Ezra said.  He stopped and held out the holocron to Ahsoka.

“It’s a Sith holocron,” he said as she carefully took it from his hand.  “So they’ll be expecting us to have it, right?”

That wasn’t his only reason.  If Maul took this chance to try and abduct him again, and he succeeded, Ezra didn’t want the holocron falling into his hands, too.  If Maul was angry at Ezra for giving the holocron to Ahsoka, he hid it well.

As Ezra followed Maul onto the platform that would carry them to the next level of the temple, Ahsoka cast a sympathetic look at Kanan.

“He’ll be alright,” she said.

“How can you be so sure?” Kanan asked.

“Because he’s _your_ apprentice,” Ahsoka said.

* * *

 

“You really think getting me away from Kanan for a few minutes is going to change anything?” Ezra asked.

“It seems you’re the one testing that theory,” Maul said.

Ezra crossed his arms and looked down, refusing to acknowledge how close to the mark Maul had hit.

“You are still my apprentice,” he said.  “I don’t have to change anything.”

He rested his hand on Ezra’s shoulder.

“You’ve always been a smart boy,” he said.  “You already know this can’t last.  All I have to do is wait.”

Ezra wrenched himself away from Maul, his hand coming up to cover his shoulder as if to erase the feeling of his former master’s touch.

“I’m not coming back,” he said quietly.  “I can't.”

“You will,” Maul said.  “Don’t forget, I know you, Ezra.  I raised you.  I know how you think, sometimes better than you know yourself.”

Before Ezra could say a word to contradict him, the platform they stood on came to a halt.  As they stepped onto the next level of the temple, a swarm of the Seventh Sister’s seeker droids descended on them.

In unison, Ezra and Maul ignited their lightsabers, deflecting the deadly bolts back toward the droids.  Ezra heard a loud _hum_ behind him and turned around just in time to deflect the lightsaber that spun through the air toward him.  The Seventh Sister reached out and pulled her weapon back into her hand before leaping from the top of the steps.

Ezra shoved with the Force, slamming her back into the stairs.  She tumbled to the bottom of the steps and quickly stood, lunging at Ezra with fury in her eyes.  She stopped in her tracks, one hand flying to her throat as she was lifted off the ground.  Ezra looked over his shoulder to see Maul holding one hand out, his eyes fixed on the Inquisitor.

As the Inquisitor gasped for air, she dropped her lightsaber, instinctively clawing at her throat to try and remove an obstruction that wasn’t physically there.

“Strike her down!” Maul said.

At Maul’s command, Ezra instinctively raised his lightsaber.  He took a hesitant step forward and froze as he took in the sight of the Inquisitor hanging helplessly in the air.

“Finish her!” Maul shouted.

Ezra’s hand tightened around his lightsaber.  He wanted to do it.  He wanted to kill her, to rid the galaxy of another Imperial, to watch the light fade from her eyes as she died.  And now he had his chance.  And he couldn’t go through with it.  She was unarmed, she couldn’t fight back.  Kanan wouldn’t want him to do it.

“I can’t!” he said.

He could feel Maul’s rage crackling in the air like electricity.  He threw his lightsaber toward the Inquisitor, all the strength of his anger behind it.  As Ezra watched, the lightsaber spun through the air, cutting through the Inquisitor’s side.  She fell to the ground, cut nearly in two, her lifeless eyes staring straight at Ezra.

Ezra felt a hand grip his arm tightly and force him to turn around.  Maul towered over him, fury in his eyes.

“What have I told you, Ezra?” he asked.  “Hesitation will get you killed.”

Ezra was saved from whatever Maul had planned to do next by the sound of a lightsaber moving quickly through the air.

Maul released Ezra and called his weapon back to his hand, shielding Ezra from the Fifth Brother’s attack.

* * *

 

Kanan ducked as the Eighth Brother’s blades spun toward his head.  As he dropped to the ground and rolled out of the way, Ahsoka leapt at the Inquisitor.  He just barely managed to deflect the strike from her right blade and dodge the blow from her left.  He stumbled back, giving Kanan the chance to draw his lightsaber across the Inquisitor’s leg.  The Inquisitor turned and viciously stabbed down toward Kanan.  As Kanan stood, he drew his blade across the hilt of the Inquisitor’s lightsaber, spending sparks shooting from the weapon.

Ahsoka slashed at the Inquisitor’s side with one of her blades.  He deflected the blow, but wasn’t fast enough to stop the next one as Ahsoka’s other blade bit deeply into his arm.

In unison, Kanan and Ahsoka lunged at the Inquisitor, driving him back over the ledge.  As he spun his lightsaber over his head, the blades carried him into the air for a moment before the damage Kanan had caused overloaded its circuits and it sparked out, sending the Inquisitor plummeting to the ground below.

The sound of two plasma blades crashing together echoed through the air.  Kanan turned toward the source of the sound.

“Go!” he said to Ahsoka.  “Get the holocron into the temple.  Let’s end this and get off this damn planet.  I’ll get Ezra.”

“Just be careful,” Ahsoka said, already running up the steps.

Kanan raced in the direction of the unmistakable sounds of combat.  As he rounded the corner, he saw Ezra and Maul fending off the Fifth Brother.  Kanan raised his lightsaber and rushed forward, bringing the blue blade slashing down across the Inquisitor’s back.  As the Inquisitor turned to face Kanan, Ezra lunged forward, thrusting his red blade at the Inquisitor’s heart.  The Fifth Brother turned back and deflected Ezra’s attack, following through with a Force push that knocked Ezra to the ground several feet away.  He raised his lightsaber as he towered over Ezra, but before he could strike, Maul leapt at him, pushing his blade through the Inquisitor’s chest.  Maul switched the blade off and flung the Inquisitor away from Ezra and over the ledge.

Before Kanan could reach Ezra’s side, Maul was there, reaching down to help Ezra up.

“You did well,” Maul said as Ezra got to his feet.  "In spite of your failure."

Kanan saw Ezra flinch at the word, like he was expecting a blow to follow it.

“Get away from him,” Kanan said.

Ezra could sense Maul’s intent just before he acted.  He released his grip on Ezra’s arm, turning around and slashing out with the single still-ignited blade of his lightsaber.  Kanan’s agonized shout as he fell to his knees hit Ezra like a blaster bolt to the chest.

“No!” Ezra shouted.  He ran to Kanan’s side and crouched beside him.  Kanan was shaking from the pain, one hand flying instinctively toward his face to cover the burning, blackened wound that crossed it.

Ezra felt something grip hard in his hair and pull him up.  He stumbled to his feet and found himself face to face with Maul.

“You’re coming with me, apprentice,” Maul said.

“No,” Ezra said.  “Never.”

Maul released his grip on Ezra’s hair and took hold of his arm, twisting it up behind his back.  Ezra’s shoulder strained, white-hot pain shooting through it as he fought to break free, but Maul just tightened his grip and pulled his other arm back.  Ezra felt binders closing tightly around his wrists.  He pushed through the Force, trying to unlock them, only for a shock to jolt through his body.

He turned around and slammed his shoulder just below Maul’s collarbone, pushing him back.  Before he could make another move, he was slammed backwards into the stone of the pyramid behind him, Maul’s hand over his throat.

“None of that, now,” Maul said.  “If you behave, I might just let the rest of your so-called family live.”

“I will _never_ stop fighting you,” Ezra spat furiously.

“You will,” Maul said, his voice low and threatening.  “I was too soft on you before, but I have ways to make sure you’re more obedient this time.”

There was a loud _snap-hiss_ of a lightsaber being activated.  Kanan stood behind Maul, his weapon drawn, pointed at Maul’s back, right over his heart.

“Let go of him,” Kanan said, pure hatred in his voice.  “Now.”

“I will make this quick,” Maul said with a smile.  He released Ezra and turned, activating his lightsaber and slashing at Kanan’s side.  Kanan blocked his attack and pushed, using the Force to throw Maul backwards.

Ezra took advantage of Maul’s distraction and dropped to the ground, looping his cuffed hands around his legs.  Once his hands were in front of him, he examined the binders, trying to find a weakness he could use to break out of them.  The Force would be the fastest way if he could use it without getting shocked.  Or if he could just work through the pain.  He thought back to everything both Maul and Kanan had taught him about focusing through distraction.  He could do this.  He had to.  He winced at the first shock but kept pushing forward.  He saw the locking mechanism in his mind, saw how it fit together and held itself in place, and…

It got him nowhere.  The harder he tried, the worse the shocks got until he couldn’t hold back a cry of pain.

“Ezra!”  That was Kanan’s voice.  Ezra looked up to see that Kanan had turned back toward him, his burned eyes staring blankly in his direction.

“Look out!” Ezra called back.  His warning was just in time for Kanan to duck and dodge another attack.  Ezra’s eyes widened as he saw that Kanan was slowly being driven back toward the ledge and the lethal fall that lay beyond it.

“No,” Ezra muttered as he watched, helpless to stop what was about to happen.

Maul’s lightsaber flashed through the air, the blades cutting straight toward Kanan’s neck.  Kanan ducked at the last second.  Sparks flew as his saber slashed across one of Maul’s legs.  Ezra felt the ripple effect as Kanan _shoved_ through the Force with all his strength, sending Maul falling over the ledge.

“Ezra!” Kanan called as he tried to locate his padawan.  He stumbled forward, his ability to navigate his surroundings seeming to almost vanish now that he was no longer fighting.

“I’m here,” Ezra said, his voice shaking as he got to his feet.  Kanan made his way toward Ezra, pulling him into a tight embrace.  He felt the cuffs around Ezra’s wrists and pulled back, reaching out with one hand and opening them.  As the binders clattered to the ground, Ezra looked up at Kanan’s face.

“Kanan,” he said.  “Your eyes…”

A shadow fell over them and Ezra looked up to see a TIE fighter descending toward the top of the temple.  With it came the deep, burning cold he’d felt so many months ago on Lothal.

“Ahsoka,” he said, a knot forming in his stomach as two conflicting instincts took hold at once.  He didn’t want to make her face this alone, but he could leave Kanan like this.

“I feel it, too,” Kanan said.  “Let’s go.”

Kanan took Ezra’s hand and Ezra led him up the steps.  As they ascended, Ezra could hear the sound of lightsabers crashing together.

“Chopper,” Ezra called into his commlink, “meet us at the top!”

He barely took the time to listen to Chopper’s acknowledgement of his words before turning his focus back to Kanan.

“Almost there,” Ezra said as they neared the top of the steps.  “Just one more.”

As they reached the highest level of the temple, Ezra saw Ahsoka, her lightsabers crossed, a bright red blade caught between them.  And wielding that blade, the piercing cold of the dark side radiating from him, consuming everything around him, was Vader.

“Don’t let him get the holocron!” Ahsoka called.

Ezra’s eyes were drawn to a burning light in the center of the room.

“Kanan, it’s --” the words died in his throat as he realized Kanan couldn’t see it.

“Wait here,” he said.  He let go of Kanan’s hand and ran toward the holocron.

“Ezra, wait!”

Ezra ignored his call and raced across the room.  He stumbled to a halt in front of the obelisk.  For a moment, he froze up, briefly mesmerized by the sight of the holocron.

Forcing himself out of his trance, he reached up and grabbed hold of the holocron.  He pulled down, but it wouldn’t move.  He pulled harder only to be thrown back by some sort of concussive force.

Ezra stumbled to his feet, staring up at the holocron.  There had to be some way to get it back.

“It takes a master and an apprentice,” Kanan said as he stumbled up behind Ezra.

Ezra nodded, and then he remembered…

“Together,” he said.

He and Kanan reached out, their hands closing around the holocron, and pulled.  Something fought them.  Whether it was the temple or the holocron, Ezra couldn’t tell.  Finally, with the abruptness of a taut rope snapping, the holocron fell from the obelisk.  As it did, the stone beneath them began to shake.  The light within the obelisk grew brighter.

“The temple’s starting to collapse,” Kanan said.

A loud binary voice called to them from across the temple.  Chopper, telling them it was time to _leave, now_.

“Come on!” Kanan said.  Ezra nodded in agreement and began to run toward the _Phantom_ , the holocron clutched tightly in one hand.

They were almost there.  They were going to make it.  They’d find Ahsoka and they’d put as much distance between themselves and this mistake as they could.

As they drew closer to the _Phantom_ , Ezra felt something pulling at him, stopping him in his tracks before dragging him back.  Ezra turned around, only for his arm to be wrenched forward.  Vader stood in the temple, one hand outstretched, pulling Ezra toward him.  No, Ezra quickly realized, not him.  The holocron.

“No!” Ezra shouted, tightening his grip on the holocron.

Kanan turned back and grabbed Ezra’s other arm, pulling him back.

“I’ve got you!” he said.  But he was slipping, and Ezra was slowly being pulled forward.  Either Kanan was going to lose his grip on Ezra, or Ezra was going to lose the holocron.

A furious shout split through the air as Ahsoka leapt at Vader, one of her blades slashing across the front of his helmet as she knocked him to the ground.

Kanan kept his grip on Ezra’s arm tight as they ran toward the _Phantom._   Ezra looked over his shoulder to make sure Ahsoka was following them, only to see that she had frozen as she began to pick herself up off the ground and was now staring at Vader, unmoving.

Her voice was quiet when she spoke, but the single word drifted through the air to Ezra’s ears.

“Anakin.”

As Ezra watched, Ahsoka got to her feet, still facing Vader, but making no move to attack.  The air around her was heavy with a storm of  _denial pain sorrow tired, bitter acceptance._

“I won't leave you,” she said, hard determination in her voice even as it broke just slightly.  “Not this time.”

“Ahsoka, no!” Ezra shouted, turning and running back toward her.

Ahsoka looked over her shoulder at him and held one hand out, throwing Ezra back toward the _Phantom_.  As Ezra moved to run after her again, Kanan’s arm snaked around his chest, dragging him onto the ship.

“No!” Ezra shouted, fighting to break free even as he saw the stone of the temple begin to fall, blocking his path back to Ahsoka.

Kanan held Ezra back as the hatch closed and Chopper piloted them away from the temple.  The _crash_ of an explosion shook the ship, but they kept flying.

Ezra stopped fighting and slumped against Kanan, his forehead pressed against his master’s shoulder as burning hot tears slid down his cheeks.  His hand tightened around the holocron, its sharp edges biting into his skin.

“There’s nothing we can do now,” Kanan said as he clung to his apprentice like he was afraid if he let go, Ezra would disappear.  “It’s over.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for major character injury

Hera was already in the landing zone when the _Phantom_ approached the base.  As the small ship landed, she hurried forward, and stopped short when the hatch opened and Ezra emerged with Kanan leaning on him for support.  A bandage was secured over Kanan’s face, covering his eyes.  Ahsoka was nowhere in sight.

Her gaze moved from Kanan to Ezra, who looked away immediately, his guilt and shame radiating from him so strongly Hera didn’t need to be strong with the Force to sense it.  She approached them tentatively.

“Kanan…”

It was all she managed to say before they practically collapsed into each other’s arms.  She wasn’t sure who was leaning on who, only that she never wanted to let him go again.

* * *

 

Ezra had remained silent as he and Hera got Kanan to the medbay, not saying a word until one of the medics asked him what had happened to Kanan, at which point, Ezra was able to force out the word “lightsaber” before he choked on tears he was trying to hold back.

As the medics led Kanan away, Hera had put her arms around Ezra, pulling him into a hug.  He’d looked up at her, blinking away tears and trying to form the words “I’m sorry.”  He froze as he saw her eyes widen just slightly.

“What happened to you?” she’d asked as she gently brushed aside a lock of hair that had fallen across his face, the better to see his…

Ezra had wrenched himself away from her and run to the _Ghost._   He’d locked himself away in his and Zeb’s cabin until he couldn’t take not knowing any longer.  He had to see for himself.

Now, he stood in the refresher, his fingers curled around the edges of the sink, the metal digging small indents into his skin as he leaned forward, keeping his eyes wide as he stared into the mirror.  He didn’t want to believe it.  He’d clung to the hope that Kanan had been wrong, that it had been a trick of the light on Malachor, but then Hera had seen it, and now Ezra was staring at undeniable evidence.

Threaded through his blue eyes, ringing his pupils, were tendrils of bright, acidic yellow.


End file.
